Scandalous Accusations

15 09 2013


As I was working myself up to my return to work tomorrow after a few days off due to putting my back out I received a most disturbing text message this evening.

My HOD who has checked in on me to ascertain my progress over the past few days typed the following:

“Don’t think I’m telling grandma how to such eggs BUT those stiletto heels you were wearing last week are ridiculously high plus they’re too big for you”.

I was outraged on behalf of my gorgeous B&W heels recently adopted from my Mum who is the same shoe size as I am but slightly wider. I lost no time in replying and jumping to their defence:

“My shoes are devastated by the implied slight on their good character. I am speaking on their behalf before lawyers are consulted. I was in fact wearing flats on both Tues and Weds last week – a fact that can be confirmed by CCTV footage”.

The shoes actually responsible for my plight are pictured above. They are the most non-descript pair of grey plimsolls or “gutties” as they are known in my homeland.

I must conclude that six-inch spiked stilettos are better for me and should be considered as the only choice for work in a job where I am forced to stand all day. Happy days!




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