Green eyed monster

13 04 2013

envy

Today I find myself filled to the brim with envy.

As I have been off work for the last two weeks I have had plenty of time to fill and I have spent a large amount of time on social networking sites. The difficulty is that on these sites you get only a snapshot of what is going on in the lives of your friends, family and acquaintances. People update their status with news of celebrations, birthdays, weddings, birth announcements and holidays. These are accompanied by flattering or amusing (and usually heavily edited) albums capturing beaming smiles and a spirit of frivolity.

But as I say this is only half the story. With a few notable exceptions amongst my online friends people do not report the bad bits.

This ability to write our own history, means that unless you were there, you never hear about the fight that broke out during a party, the hangover that followed; the months of planning a wedding and the arguments, tears and tantrums over who should sit where and with whom; the countless months couples spend trying to conceive before they are successful in starting their family and the growing disappointment and desperation as each month passes; the overtime clocked up at work to pay for fabulous holidays and days out or the huge credit card bills that must be settled long after the event.

Still even knowing this, it is easy to fall into the trap of assuming that everyone in the world bar you is having a fabulous time 24/7, has amazing luck and does not have to lift a finger to bring about the changes they desire. Jealousy is an extremely unattractive quality and more often than not it is our own choices that stand in our way from achieving what we really want rather than the product of poor luck.

I was thinking about this when I remembered the sonnet I learnt in my first year of drama school.

Shakespeare Sonnet 29

When, in disgrace with Fortune and men’s eyes,

I all alone beweep my outcast state,

And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries,

And look upon myself and curse my fate,

Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,

Featured like him, like him with friends possessed,

Desiring this man’s art, and that man’s scope,

With what I most enjoy contented least,

Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising,

Haply I think on thee, and then my state,

Like to the lark at break of day arising

From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven’s gate

For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings,

That then I scorn to change my state with kings.

I took comfort from this and listed in my head all the things that make me feel truly blessed starting with my amazing husband. I read a great quote earlier that is applicable “Blowing out another persons candle will not make yours shine brighter”. So I must banish the green eyed monster – unless it comes in the form of this fabulous cocktail!

GreenEyedMonster_det

Recipe

1 part Green Chartreuse

1 part Gin

1 part sweet Vermouth

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