The future father of my children…shortlist under consideration

6 02 2013


Despite much competition for this role, there is one candidate who towers above all the rest and seems to warrant an interview for the position of the future father of my children although I am still awaiting word from Antonio Banderas and Brad Pitt!

The candidate in question married me in July 2004. He has been a steadfast partner in all aspects of my life ever since. Taking marriage out of the equation, we have had 14 wonderful years together and have experienced the highs and lows associated with any long term relationship and stuck it out.

He has his flaws, for example he is not a traditional ‘romantic’ (more to follow at a later date) but he does value the little things that are really important. He is not a hearts and flowers guy, but he does know that I like an energy drink in the morning and will always leave me one; not in the fridge, but on our kitchen countertop, because he knows that I prefer it room temperature rather than chilled.

He also knows which side of the bed I prefer, leaves me in peace when I am catching up on Coronation Street, demonstrates considerable patience when I talk about work, helps me learn three part harmonies for my musical endeavours, (often learning both male and female parts), he supports me in my work life and turns up to major events and (grudgingly) endures my hobbies (particularly my love of theatre), he has also embraced my family and passed the Mother-in-law test.

He is a ‘Good Husband’.

If I was to quibble and pick holes I would I occasionally like to receive flowers; although I love that the things he does value carry more importance.

Should Mr Banderas or Mr Pitt apply for the role of the Future Father of my Children (henceforth known as FFOMC) then they would need to demonstrate equal or superior tolerance of my quirks. For example: Corrie, Eastenders and Emmerdale are as much a part of my life as my job; low betide anyone who attempts to separate me from them – the choice for the FFOMC is learn to love them as much as me or play WOW in the next room.

The current candidate is already loved by my family and we plan to go away with my parents for a short break within the next year.  Mr Banderas and Mr Pitt would still have to prove themselves to my nearest and dearest.

My side of the bed is the one furthest away from the door btw so that my husband can protect me in the event of a burglary – obviously this is not negotiable. I have also mentioned boyfriend/girlfriend sing-along nights before on my blog and although I appreciate that this is particularly quirky it is important to me that a prospective FFOMC, will need to accept and adapt to my neurosis and ‘man-up’ when the occasion demands that he offer assistance with my more frivolous needs.

As I write this I am realising that I am a tad high maintenance – as I have no plans to change it appears even more important that the FFOMC undergoes a rigorous screening process.

For earlier posts about FFOMC check out:




8 responses

12 02 2013
Clare Stewart

Loving your blog!! Apologies for the comments but I have to 🙂 I think I have learned a bit about the “typical romantic” type of man.I received and present yesterday.It was a tall,tubular “glitter lamp”.He came home all excited saying”I got you something”.
My heart had one of those mini heart attacks,when ,in a split second,I thought of all the horrendous things that he may have been trying to cover up by buying me flowers.Then he produced,not flowers, but the glitter lamp.I keep my PC in the garage(almost childproof)and sit there in the evenings.He thought I would like the lamp for ambience as oppose to the bare bulb of the garage light.Thoughtful? yes.
Then I was reading your blog by the light of my lamp…..and I realised…the lamp was his way of being romantic.He was making life more comfortable for me(and my eyes).Instead of a normal “lamp” I had got a glitter,lava type thing.The glitter was his way of saying how sparkly I was,not just a normal partner but one who gave of sparkles and the slow calm movement of the oil inside was his way of telling me how easy-going and calm I am in a crisis(as oppose to his frantic,panic reaction to everything).I mentioned these points to him and he agreed.An impulse buy but with so much sub-concious thought,that even he was surprised :)…I was almost ashamed that my imagination had only stretched to a flight to Liverpool for his Birthday.
The girls who get the flowers,chocolates and diamonds may seem lucky,but when you analyse it,they are only getting the “norm”.Where is the sub-concious thoughts of the partners who know them inside out??…The obvious isn`t always the best…and I know from now on,I will be looking at the thought that was put in rather than the object that has been handed over….providing he never,ever thinks its in someway romantic to buy me an iron,blender or some other “household” applicance :):):):)

12 02 2013

Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment 🙂
Love the sound of your glitter lamp – very thoughtful gift and it will have way more longevity than the flowers.

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